Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Wrestling with Resolutions

Three (almost four now) days into the new year and I've not listed out or talked about any concrete NY resolutions..

Those who know me may find this to be a surprise. As far as I myself could remember, I've always been one who entered into a new year with optimism and enthusiasm, and with a list of things I wanted to achieve in that fresh new year!

They would cover different aspects of my spiritual, work and personal life.. some are more specific, and some more general. I even blogged about my new year resolutions on the last day of 2005.. for the year that has just passed.

But guess what? I failed almost all of them miserably! Perhaps the only one which I did make a little of progress is in the fitness department. But looking back at my own calender of going to gym, there were several months in the year I was totally sedentary too.

This is nothing new really... for as long as I remember, I could never lived up to my so-called NY resolutions.. For certain years, I started off not too badly, but then slacked along the way. Then for others, the resolutions totally never took off!!

Sigh. :(

Maybe I'm older and `wiser'(?) or just more realistic and a little more cynical. This year I don't even have the motivation to set proper NY resolutions anymore.. cos I don't have the courage to list them down and see that I not able to accomplish them again for the umpteenth time!

Having said that, in my mind, there are some areas that I would like to work on..

Yeah, I think it's wise not to call them `resolutions', but more like trying to overcome some of the struggles and weaknesses that I know I should improve on..

For instance, I need to change the owl-like pattern.. No, I'm not going to be drastic and say I would wake up at 7am every morning! But I must stop sleeping at 3-4am on a regular basis.. and try to get up earlier..

Another area in dire need of attention is my weight problem. Yes, I am now exercising quite regularly but no, I have not lost weight - instead the contrary! Maybe not working had made me too comfortable and I just love food too much! I've reached an all-time high in the weight department - and the inches too!! ARGH!! So yes, losing weight is an aged old battle that I have to fight this year.. and this will go hand-in-hand with working out.

As I type this, I can think of more things I hope to do this year -`hope' is the word - such as be prudent on my spending and save some money, read more books (I have TONNES of books unread on my shelves), play the piano more (I'm now quite rusty - wasted the Grade 8!)

However, there is one `resolution' quite specific that I really hope and pray I would accomplish.. and that is to read the whole Bible this year. For that I have bought the `One Year Bible' which is structured in such a way that if I just followed it diligently, I could make it. The lady at the shop proudly told me it was not difficult as she did it.

Err... I know, all these need quite a bit of hard work and self-discipline but they're not unachiveable.

To think of it, maybe I should list `blog regularly' as one of my resolutions! After all, this is something that I managed to do for the whole 2006! (and since I started blogging in 2005)

It's funny that I failed badly in those things that really mattered but kept doing something like blogging.. Isn't life an irony? Or is it just me?

But the optimist in me still believe I can make this a better year, if I really want it to be. And maybe blogging, like writing, has its place too.. as it can serve as a reminder and a testimony. ;)

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